Birmingham Family Law Blog

Creating the ideal parenting plan: 5 tips for the newly separated

Parents who are going through a divorce know that they have to create a parenting plan that considers their children's needs as well as their own responsibilities. It can be hard to come up with a plan, though, especially if you and your estranged spouse don't get along.

Since you're newly separated, this is the time when you have to set up a custody plan for your kids. Not doing so soon will mean a significant disruption in their routine, which is harmful to kids in a lot of ways. There are a few things you can do to set up a solid parenting plan.

Types of marital assets that you may not have considered

Going through a divorce is always a logistical undertaking as well as an emotional one. It is not easy to manage both journeys at the same time, but by being organized and planning ahead, you can make the process easier.

The division of assets in a divorce case has the potential to significantly affect your life for years to come, and this is why it is important to take it seriously. Alabama state law does not recognize community property asset division, meaning that your marital assets will not be automatically split equally between the two of you. This means that there is everything to play for in the asset division process and that you need to fight to prove what you deserve.

Mediation can be the key to a more affordable divorce

Divorce proceedings have a reputation for being expensive, time-consuming and emotionally draining. However, divorce is not an inherently difficult process. Instead, it is the emotional attachments of the people involved that can lead to contentious and painful divorces.

While it can be quite difficult to set aside your very normal emotions during a divorce, you can still make efforts to deprioritize them during the divorce process. Instead, you want to focus on keeping your divorce as simple, affordable and painless as possible for everyone involved.

Why the victim mentality is horrible for your divorce

Victims blame other people for their life circumstances. Blame takes the attention of the other person and assigns all evildoing to the person getting the finger pointed at them. The truth is, both people agreed to marry each other. It was not a forced marriage, and if red flags were not seen before hand, one must analyze why they weren’t noticed and what red flags were they putting out that contributed to a failed marriage.

Avoiding any real responsibility for the crumbling of a marriage is only going to short-circuit the healing process and raise the odds of another failed marriage or relationship thereafter. Victims not only blame, but they have a sense of entitlement for their distress. They feel entitled to the sympathy of others and the attention for their wounds that were all caused by the other person. Enablers like friends and family who only take their side will impede the victim’s personal growth and healing.

How the newer divorce laws impact retirement proceedings

Retirement funds are a sensitive topic when it comes to divorce proceedings. While areas such as child custody and standard asset divisions impact both your immediate and far future, retirement primarily focuses on the later parts of your life and can be difficult to envision. For many divorcees, those chances of retiring sooner and peacefully can feel like they have taken a turn for the worse.

However, the court knows how difficult the process can be and tries to help both parties get what they need utilizing different methods and state laws. In 2017, the state updated some major bills on handling retirement benefits in divorce. It is important to be aware of these different changes before you go into the courtroom so you can have an easier time planning your future.

Modifying your child custody in Alabama

As your child has grown and your relationship has developed, you hope to gain more custody rights. The process to receiving more rights to your child's life includes important steps in Alabama, but if a judge decides that the change proves positive for your child, you may begin making life decisions and even living with your child.

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